In their continuing pursuit of maintaining order and control in a chaotic world, many legislators often push the envelope of rational and intelligent thinking.
With that in mind, here then, from dumblaws.com, are a few questionable laws from our own Tri-State region.
Some are still on the books. Some have been repealed. Some did not even become an actual law. Nevertheless, it is fortunate for us that our local constabulary has enough sense to see the ludicrousness of these laws and not actively enforce them. Or do they?
State Laws: Ohio
–It is illegal to fish for whales on Sunday.
–It is illegal to get a fish drunk.
(Legislatorial make-work or chronic problem? Obviously, you do not want to compound your problems by getting a fish intoxicated while on your Sunday whaling expedition.)
–Participating in or conducting a duel is prohibited.
(Would this apply to equally armed gang members as well?)
City Laws: Ohio
Bexley
–Ordinance number 223, of 09/09/19 prohibits the installation and usage of slot machines in outhouses.
(What’s the harm? Outhouses are obviously too small for the table games, besides, the house is sure to win because the player always “craps out.” Sorry, I just couldn’t let that one pass.)
Cleveland
–Women are forbidden from wearing (black) patent leather shoes, lest men see reflections of their underwear.
(A law worth writing a play about)
–It is illegal to catch mice without a hunting license.
(Certainly an inexpensive food source, but it takes a mess of them to create an entre.)
Strongsville
–Catch 22 is banned.
(Which, the novel by Joseph Heller, or a situation characterized by absurdity or senselessness? If it’s the latter, I’m all for it.)
State Laws: Kentucky
–Throwing eggs at a public speaker could result in up to one year in prison.
(And sure to leave a fowl taste in the speaker’s mouth.)
City Laws: Kentucky
Lexington
–By law, anyone who has been drinking is “sober” until he or she “cannot hold onto the ground.”
(You know you’re really drunk when…)
–It is illegal to transport an ice cream cone in your pocket.
(With or without the ice cream?)
State Laws: Indiana
–A man over the age of 18 may be arrested for statutory rape if the passenger in his car is not wearing her socks and shoes, and is under the age of 17.
(What if the passenger is wearing socks and shoes, but nothing else?)
–The value of Pi is 3.2, and not 3.1415.
Citation: Not an actual law. Was proposed in the 1897 session of the Indiana General Assembly. Engrossed Bill No. 246. The bill was passed in the House of Representatives, but it was indefinitely postponed in the Senate. That status remains today.
(Fellow senators, I move that we handle the moral laws before tackling the immutable laws.)
–It is illegal for a man to be sexually aroused in public.
(Headline: State legislators take a firm, uncompromising position on public indecency.)
City Laws: Indiana
Elkhart
–It is illegal for barbers to threaten to cut off a child’s ear.
South Bend
–It is illegal to make a monkey smoke a cigarette.
(You might be a Redneck if…)
This is just a smattering of the myriad laws of our land. With laws like these, it is no wonder our judicial system has its problems.
Friday, July 4, 2025