The 2011 Billboard Music Awards were certainly interesting this year. To me, this awards show sort of felt like the accidental baby in the family of awards shows. It came late, way behind the Oscars and the Grammy’s. The timing could’ve been forgivable, had it not been so anti-climactic. It seems as though it didn’t know what to do with itself. The host, Ken Jeong (who is usually hilarious), fell flat. The audience seemed bored. The transitions were awkward. Even Britney Spears seemed lost. But we’ll get to that.
Here are my best of the worst picks for the evening:
Tied for first in the Worst Performance category were Rihanna and the Black Eyed Peas. Rihanna started the show with her hit single “S&M,” which just came off as being awkward. Am I the only one who wants to take her to therapy? Wasn’t it only a year or so ago that Chris Brown was beating her up?
Either way, Rihanna was trying to be sexy, but just came off as being awkward. Hands were popping up out of the stage, trying to grope her. It just left me stale. I felt violated and mortified. “This can’t get any worse,” I thought.
Oh contraire. That’s when Britney joined her on stage. And then they both tried to be strippers. Needless to say, it did not go well.
As for the Black Eyed Peas, they delivered another techno disaster. I’m not sure if they realize it or not, but they have passed their prime. People don’t really care much about them anymore. Nor, really, did anyone ever.
I can’t describe to you what their performance was like, simply because there was no performance. It was just Will.I.Am and Fergie prancing around the stage with the other two guys trying to keep up. I’m not impressed, Peas, not impressed.
Just as a side note, I’m pretty sure that Britney Spears was lip-syncing during her duet with Nicki Minaj, though I’m not surprised. Again, she seemed pretty lost.
Tied for the Most Undeserved Win were Justin Bieber and, again, the Black Eyed Peas. Justin Beiber won the most streamed artist, but really only because of the thirteen year old girls (who, as we’ve seen with “Twilight,” are apparently a force to be reckoned with). Let’s be honest. Justin didn’t win because he’s talented or creative. He won because his fans are psycho and want his body (which he hasn’t even grown into yet).
The Black Eyed Peas won for the best group/duo. How they managed to do so, I’m not sure. But, then again, during their performance, Fergie managed to be off-pitch throughout the entire medley. So I guess the Black Eyed Peas are just full of surprises.
Finally, I want to give out the Most Awkward Moment award. Now, there were plenty of awkward moments in this ceremony. Really, anything involving the host, Ken Jeong, was pretty awkward. Bret Michaels trying to be awesome was also pretty uncomfortable, as was the Neil Diamond sing along.
But I’d like to give this award to everyone’s favorite pop princess, the Spearster. She was the most entertaining part of the show, considering that whenever they showed her on camera, she seemed completely lost. I’m not sure if she knew how she got there.
Even during her performance, she seemed bewildered. Whenever someone won an award, her expression was a priceless cross between confusion and brainlessness. Or maybe Britney was just expressing what we were all thinking: why is this show even happening?
Here’s to hoping next year has a little bit more class. But I’m not holding my breath.